Play the video below… and when you do, turn it up loud and close your eyes… Something about the sounds of the waves crashing on the shores, kids playing in the distance, and the melody slowly creeping in, just puts a huge smile on my face.
I feel at peace. I feel centered. I feel whole. It’s been a long time coming and I am rejoicing in my current surroundings. Took a lot of work to get here.
I have lived a life of fear and anger, very resentful about the cards I was dealt and the abuse I endured growing up. I have come to terms with many things, and while I don’t want to point fingers at people, I will say there came a point when I had to accept the key players in my life for who they really are, and not the idealistic hopes I so fiercely held on to. I am extremely proud of the woman I have become, with very little help… but I hit a wall and knew it was time to make a real change in my thinking, in my psyche, in my heart. My childhood was non-existent and I hated every minute of living under someone else’s roof. I remember watching the movie “Grease” and being so envious of the kids in the movie. They were about to graduate from high school and go out into the real world. I thought to myself, “I can’t wait to be 18. I can’t wait to get out of this place and be my own boss.” Yes, I said these things to myself at the tender age of 7. Sad but true.
I always wished things were different and allowed that wish to keep me down, but embarking on the path of forgiveness has allowed me to drop the weight I carried on my shoulders. It is a process, but one I am gladly working on.
No one can change things for you. If you want to make a change in your life, it is 100% up to you. Yes, you can find help… and if you are lucky, you can connect with someone who has been in your shoes and can relate… perhaps showing you the light and make the journey easier. I am comforted in knowing that my evolution is gaining momentum and I am fiercely and bravely embracing the gentle female I was never allowed to be growing up. It feels amazing to be myself and be true to who I am. My hope is that you will find your path and never waiver from your own goals and dreams.